My Last Day

by Marie Rojas

If today were to be my last day,

Would anyone know that I’d gone away?

How many days do you think would pass

Before someone would miss my ass?

How many days would fly right by

Before someone called just to say hi?

And after no answer for a day or two,

Would they come by and say, “hey you!

“Anyone home? I rang the bell,

But inside your house is quiet as hell.”

 

If this was to be my last night,

If I was gone and out of sight,

How long before anyone came?

Someone who knew me and my name?

A day, a week, a month or two,

Long after I’d moved into the blue.

Will anyone miss me or even care

That I’m no longer here to share?

I pose this question in deep despair

Wondering how and when and where

I lost my way on this winding road,

Into a depressive episode.

 

Righteous, indignant, my path my own

It was a choice I made, to be alone:

The most important thing that I could be

Was mother to the children God gave me.

The choice was easy, the choice was clear,

There were regrets and promises to fear.

I made many errors, but in my defense

They will be forgiven, in independence.

I thought myself good, I thought myself wise;

So, to be so alone is to me a surprise.

I missed something along the way,

For loneliness at the end of the day

Came insidiously, through the years

Of quiet nights and hidden tears.

 

If today is to be my last day,

Will anyone notice, I’ve gone away?

 

© 2017 Marie Rojas